[And now to wrap the bandages around the wound while he finishes his story.]

I got down to the ground first. Then I took an axe from the woodshop and before the giant could make it down, I chopped the beanstalk down. Even rallied some villagers to help, seeing as how the giant would be bad news for the lot of them. The beanstalk came down and so did the giant, landing right on his head and killing him. I made my mom a rich woman and the villagers celebrated me as a hero, setting the stage for my career as a famous giant slayer.

[Nevermind the threat of a giant was his fault, as he had been a thief who stole from the giant.]

Of course, that's a whole other story for another time. Maybe one day you'll get to see the movie version.

[And there, Archie, you're all done. Jack takes a moment to admire his handiwork.]

That should do it.