He's put together in halves, with one half broken and the other perfectly formed and Kakashi thinks he should know this man, should know why he's condemning him with hate in his mismatched eyes that flash back to the moment Kakashi finds himself standing with lightning coming out of his hand, cutting straight through a girl's chest. Lightning and guilt and Kakashi's left eye is pounding, head spinning as much as it's felt cracked open as he gasps for breath, eyes wide open but not seeing what's right before him, not realizing that he's got his hand wrapped around a throat and is crushing a windpipe in his grip when all he can see and feel is lightning and a girl who stares at him with shock in her eyes.
(Do you feel guilty.)
There are hands clawing at his arm and Kakashi suddenly realizes that this is not a dream, and when he blinks again he sees his lover under him. Sees his hand wrapped around the column of Barnaby's neck, fingers digging into the soft flesh. He can feel the surge of Barnaby's heart in his hand and it's just like the feeling of her heart bursting open (but that was a dream, that wasn't real, this is, this is real) and Kakashi's gasp is a ragged sound in the back of his throat. He releases his hand and recoils, moving so quickly for a moment he's almost a blur of silver and black in the shadows, retreating from Barnaby to the edge of the bed as he just stares at his lover in horror. In shock.
(You could have killed him.)
His entire body shakes as he tries to control the panic that rises up the back of his throat and wraps itself around his lungs, making his breath shallow and far too fast. ]
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He's put together in halves, with one half broken and the other perfectly formed and Kakashi thinks he should know this man, should know why he's condemning him with hate in his mismatched eyes that flash back to the moment Kakashi finds himself standing with lightning coming out of his hand, cutting straight through a girl's chest. Lightning and guilt and Kakashi's left eye is pounding, head spinning as much as it's felt cracked open as he gasps for breath, eyes wide open but not seeing what's right before him, not realizing that he's got his hand wrapped around a throat and is crushing a windpipe in his grip when all he can see and feel is lightning and a girl who stares at him with shock in her eyes.
(Do you feel guilty.)
There are hands clawing at his arm and Kakashi suddenly realizes that this is not a dream, and when he blinks again he sees his lover under him. Sees his hand wrapped around the column of Barnaby's neck, fingers digging into the soft flesh. He can feel the surge of Barnaby's heart in his hand and it's just like the feeling of her heart bursting open (but that was a dream, that wasn't real, this is, this is real) and Kakashi's gasp is a ragged sound in the back of his throat. He releases his hand and recoils, moving so quickly for a moment he's almost a blur of silver and black in the shadows, retreating from Barnaby to the edge of the bed as he just stares at his lover in horror. In shock.
(You could have killed him.)
His entire body shakes as he tries to control the panic that rises up the back of his throat and wraps itself around his lungs, making his breath shallow and far too fast. ]