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(no subject)

Who: Robert Hastings (

semper_cogitans) and Hamato Donatello (

i_speak_softly)
What: Celebrating the birthday of a certain Turtle.
When: February 6th
Where: Around the village, though the Battle Dome's a standout locale.
Summary: While there's some rare peace, Robert tries to give Don some semblance of a birthday celebration by doing everything he's terrible at.
Rating: Shouldn't be anything too bad here. PG-13 maybe at most? Or maybe B for Birthday.

Thanks to the genius of Don's winter room, this year the Turtle is actually coherent on the day Robert remembers he defined as his birthday. And while the birthdate might not even be particularly accurate, it's nonetheless significant enough to Robert that he wants to commemorate it somehow.

So what better way than by making himself look a little silly doing all the things his partner is so fond of? Don had already wanted to go for a run, and it was easy enough from there to suggest a sparring session of sorts afterwards - they've been cooped up inside too long, and need the exercise anyway.

All of this is a little nervewracking for the scientist, but he is determined to make it work as he makes his way to the Turtle's winter room bright and early in the morning.

One way or another, he is going to make sure Don has fun today.

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Don refocuses, and slides a little distance away from Robert - if they're going to talk, he wants to be able to see his partner probably.

"Of course you're unapproachable. You're human."

"But," Robert counters, looking a little more serious about this, "I perform human instinctually-based acts on you, and that is not a problem to you... or so it seems. So... why would it be one in the opposite situation?"

Not that Robert is good at separating his instincts from his cognitive functions, for multiple reasons, but he is certain that this is true. And if Don puts up with it from him, then there's literally no excuse about the opposite.

"Because I'm human-ish, but you're not a turtle."

So obviously the onus is on him to bridge the distance between them.

Robert tilts his head slightly.

"I may not be, but that does not stop me from wanting you to be who you are, without restriction... nor does it stop me from appreciating, or even desiring, such expressions."

Quietly: "You don't know what you're asking."

With a surprising firmness: "After all the research I have done on the subject, I would hope to have some idea."

~~Though this now sounds like it means something different from what Robert actually intended.~~

Don stares at Robert in disbelief: not that he did research, but that he came to this conclusion.

"Then why would you want that?"

Robert might be starting to realize that Don is asking this about all turtle habits, rather than strictly the gentler ones, but - despite the discomfort the question raises, for unrelated reasons - he still answers this immediately.

"Because it is part of you... it is part of who you are, and I am loathe to... have you hide that..."

There may be other reasons, too. Reasons that Robert is not so forthcoming on.

"I don't like that part of me. The turtle is stupid and selfish, and aside from biological necessities I don't care what he thinks or wants."

The man visibly deflates at this.

"If you do not want to, then... that is one thing... but I do not think any part of you is stupid, Don. Not in the least..."

"I really don't want to." Don studies Robert's disappointment, and relents a little. "We can talk about it, but please don't ask me to do those things."

Hurriedly, Robert shakes his head. "No - I would not, if you are uncomfortable. I... I merely wondered... why... that is all."

It actually isn't, and Don can probably tell, but Robert would never push this anyway. Besides, he has his own convoluted feelings about the topic.

Don is okay with a slow and circuitous conversation. This is obviously difficult for both of them.

"Why would I want to give in to my worse impulses? That's exactly what we should all try not to do."

Mildly awkwardly, Robert asks, "Exactly how is... stroking one's mate's face a "worse" impulse...?"

He does know that there is a lot more than that involved, but what stops Don from just... doing that rather than anything more violent?

Don stares disbelievingly, starting to wonder if he knows quite what they're talking about.

"It's weird."

Robert's starting in the shallow end of this particular awkward pool, for once, rather than just jumping in at the deepest point.

"Humans often touch each others' faces as well... granted, perhaps not in the same way, but it is not so strange. And certainly... it is not strange to me." But then again, very little is.

Don grapples with this idea for a long moment, opening and closing his mouth wordlessly. Then, he just says:

"No."

"As you wish," Robert says softly, not quite looking at Don now. He still doesn't really understand why the Turtle is so vehement about not acting on these parts of himself, but if they really are so repugnant to him, he won't push. If there's anything Robert is good at, it's being a doormat to Don.

Don hunches down in the blankets, evidently distressed by the conversation. Does Robert think he's some kind of animal, thinly restraining his real desires? And what must the man think about himself, to be willing to let Don do things like that to him?

That mental worrying is so far off the mark it's not even funny. Hell, Robert is the one sitting here thinking he's doing this wrong - since day one sexuality has largely been on his terms, filtered through his human desires, and Don has been the subject of those whims. All things considered, it seems perfectly normal for this to at least be explored almost two years into their relationship.

It would be nice if Don actually asked these questions, though, because otherwise Robert will just sit here looking saddened, like this conversation went every way but the one he was hoping for. (He didn't even get a proper answer.) In the meantime, however, Robert is going to do the one thing he knows how to do - apologize.

"... I... am s-sorry, if I... offended or hurt you with my qu-questioning..."

He doesn't know what he said wrong, but it's obvious he said something wrong.

Edited 2013-02-25 03:15 (UTC)

Don fidgets with the edge of the blanket, carefully avoiding looking at Robert.

"It's okay. I just -- I don't understand what you're asking me."

A large part of Robert wants to be completely honest right now, to admit to Don at least some facet of the reasoning behind why he's so surprised - and a little sad - that Don so thoroughly rejects his more feral instincts... but admitting those things would also require admitting that he has been dwelling too much on something that is taboo for him, even now. Can he do that, even with someone he trusts as much as Don? What would the Turtle even think, if he's so horrified already by even considering it...?

"I... I simply w-wanted to be certain... of your exact r-reasoning. And in truth, your reasoning... m-matters little, beyond me wanting to understand - b-because, of course, if you do not want to, the point is moot; it will not h-happen -"

Robert stops, realizing he's verbally flailing, and takes a breath to calm himself.

"... I m-meant it to be essentially the same as... asking about any aspect of our r-relationship. Perhaps I... w-worded myself... poorly... but I m-meant to ask, before... before it became p-potentially relevant..."

Is his less-than-scientific interest obvious? Should he just admit what Robert already fears is so blatant that he sounds like he's lying?

Don takes a slow breath, and then speaks quietly, in a strange and unfamiliar cadence.

"I have body-desire for these things you talked about, but I do not have rational-desire, and... my mind is of the greater importance." His eyes flick up to Robert. "Do we have the same understanding?"

It's a few seconds before the man actually responds to this, and as he does he kneads his hands so thoroughly that it looks like he might bruise them.

"... wh-what if I were to... say that I had e-experienced both desires, in this r-regard...?"

As soon as he says it, he falls silent, like perhaps he regretted even putting such a sentence into words.

Edited 2013-03-02 02:26 (UTC)

Don blinks at Robert, trying to determine how specifically he means this. After a moment, he decides the man is serious.

"You increase the degree of complexity, Robert."