Grand Opening!

[widows_kiss]

Who: Anyone and Everyone!
What: Official Grand Opening of Luceti's coffee shop
When: Monday, July 15th
Where: A Shot in the Dark Cafe
Summary: Stop by for some free coffee, today only! Wait, that's not right...
Rating: With this bunch? Who knows.


Okay, so technically they'd opened on July 1st, but Natasha wanted to give her new staff a few days to get used to working with the machines and getting the hang of things before going all out. Over the weekend, she put up some fliers and started getting the word spread around town where she could. It's not like Luceti's all that big that she doesn't think people will hear about it. Plus, there's a wave of new arrivals now settling in, so it's as good a time as any to have a public event.

Fortunately the weather turns out to be nice for the day, and Natasha's got the outdoor tables set up as well as the ones in the cafe. They're serving both hot and cold drinks - coffees, lattes, even Italian sodas and anything that could possibly be mixed from their menu - as well as some baked goods and snacks to go along with them.

Anyone's welcome to stop by at any point, whether its just to check the place out, catch up with friends or make some new ones.

Comments

[spohkh]

[Spock almost twinges at the use of the name 'Sparky'... No matter.]

If by 'wenches' you mean those who sell themselves for sexual favours....I would only hope that there can be none found here. If, on the other hand, you using the term as a derogatory, then I would ask that you reconsiders your words Captain.

[The Vulcan pauses for a moment...]
Are you by any chance intoxicated at this time?

[all7seas]

I'm positivically STINKING.

[spohkh]

[Spock tilts his head...]

If you refer to exuding an unpleasant odour... then you are correct. However, you did not answer my question.

[all7seas]

No, no no no no. SOUSED. Smashed. Three sheets to the bloody wind, mate.

[YES HE IS DRUNK SPOCK.]

[spohkh]

[Spock's eyebrows creased in slight confusion.]

Judging by your excessive use of slang vernacular and current mannerisms... You are indeed inebriated.

Do you wished to be escorted home? This is not a 'drinking' establishment.

[all7seas]

I'm not drinking. I'm DRUNK.

[He shouts this loudly while simultaneously crashing against a table full of crockery. It clatters. Some of it smashes to the floor.]

Bugger. Who put this table here?!

[spohkh]

[Spock no longer looks confused, rather slightly annoyed.
The Vulcan stands.]

Now that it has been verified that you are indeed inebriated, I will assist you to your place of residence.
This is a new establishment... the destruction of its furniture is not appreciated.

[Impromptu bouncer? I think so.
Spock takes a step towards Jack.]

[all7seas]

Oi -- what are you doing?

[Jack just stands there swaying. He doesn't attempt to get away.]

[spohkh]

[Spock takes a step closer.] I am escorting you out of this establishment.
If you are amenable, I can take you home where you can then 'sleep it off'...

[krakensnack]

You're a......male escort?

[This is a surprise. He'd never pegged Spock to be one of those.]

[spohkh]

[That made Spock pause and tilt his head in confusion....]

I am of a male gender yes... and I am about to escort you to your place of residence. However, your question implies a problem.

What is the problem exactly?

[all7seas]

You're a man-whore.

[spohkh]

[Spock's eyes widened in shock.]

A....!
I beg your pardon? What has lead you to believe this horrendously erronious assumption?

[all7seas]

Your offers of esh--esh--ESHCORT.

[Being drunk makes words hard.]

[spohkh]

[Spock frowns slightly...]

I can assure you that one does not equal the other.
Now, if you please...

[Spock walks forward, placing his fisted hand (compliments of the Malnosso) on Jack's back... attempting to steer him out of the coffee shop.]

[all7seas]

[How can Jack NOT be steered? He's drunk, and it's Spock. He stumbles on the way.]

Bugger. When did you grow so tall, Shparky?

[spohkh]

I have been one point eighty five meters for approximately fifteen years...

[Spock managed to shove the door open and guide them both into the night air.]

Where is your place of residence?
[Spock wasn't actually entirely certain where Jack lived.]

[all7seas]

House Seven. But don't bring me there -- I can make it meself. Got two legs and three hands, me. [He will try to disentangle himself from the Vulcan once they are outdoors.]

[spohkh]

[Spock's eyebrow couldn't go any further...]

Captain, you do in fact, have only two hands... and legs that are barely functional.

[The Vulcan continues to hang onto Jack as they venture outside... awkwardly avoiding Jack's attempts at getting away but hanging on nonetheless.]

[all7seas]

Everything's functioning fine, I'll have you know! But Buffy won't want me home in such a state. All stinking of alcohol and all. Best to leave me on the front porch.
[At least House 7 is REALLY close to Good Spirits.]

[spohkh]

[Spock continues to push him along...]

Simply leaving you on the 'porch' would be irresponsible of me. If you were aware that Miss Summers would not appreciate you being in such a state, then you should be willing to face the consequences of your actions.

It might be wise for you to consider not consuming so much alcohol in the future.

[Vulcans are killjoys.]