( Closed )

[padme_amidala]

Who: Anakin and Padmé
What: A very determined Senator is chasing the Jedi she loves best.
When: A week ago.
Where: The farm.
Summary: Love isn't easy.
Rating: PG-13 for darker themes.
The woman who had infinite patience for her people fought herself for days in order to leave her husband to his thoughts. Every morning she woke, expecting to find him beside her and every night she only managed to fall asleep once she had thoroughly exhausted herself. Exhaustion was the only thing that gave her a respite from constantly imagining Anakin suffering alone.

However the time finally came when she couldn't stand to be away from him for a moment longer. She briefly collected her thoughts, cloaked herself - for anonymity - and left the house. Her steps took her through the village streets as silently as a ghost. The first place she visited was the farm where she knew Anakin would throw himself into work to forget his pain.

They shared that trait.

Pausing in the middle of the odds and ends, she kept her silence. Calling his name might give her away - he was trying to stay away from her, after all - yet that was probably a lost cause. The Force would inform him of her presence.

Suppressing a sigh, she moved around one robot and then another, holding her cloak close to her body. As the sun set, she looked more and more like a shadow moving independently of the fading light.

Comments

[ignite_the_stars]

“That’s not what I want.” He shook his head. The last thing he wanted was to enter politics – loving Padmé was as close as he wanted to get to all of that. “I just want you safe.”

And Anakin wasn’t convinced he was absolved from anything just because it hadn’t happened yet for him.

“But they have happened – for Luke and Leia. That mattes, that counts. We don’t get to change anything back home. I’m still the same person, I’m still a danger to everyone.”

[padme_amidala]

"And I am safe." her eyes stung, "The safest place for me is with you." it was how she felt. Knowing he was in the village - mere walking distance between them - was maddening. She hated being away from him and knowing he was suffering.

"Luke and Leia have never pushed you away. They want to know you. You are their father and -" she pressed her lips together, "I don't regret marrying you. I'm proud to be your wife. What the future holds..." she closed her eyes tiredly, "It isn't what we want. I'm sorry, Ani. If Palpatine were here, he wouldn't survive a meeting with me."

It was the first time she had felt so fiercely angry at another. But he had not only taken Anakin from her, but also Luke, Leia and the democracy she had worked so hard to achieve.

[ignite_the_stars]

Anakin felt a spike of anger at that; because he knew that Leia was pushing him away, she didn’t want to get to know him, and she did not see him as her father. He could feel it through the Force. Saying otherwise hurt on so many levels – it ignored the truth and played him like some kind of fool.

“Padmé, stop telling me that! Stop trying to lie to me about Leia, I know she doesn’t want to know me- she doesn’t consider me her father! Stop trying thinking I’m some gullible idiot who can’t see what’s right in front of him.”

[padme_amidala]

Everything was growing dark again and Padmé felt her breath catch. Her vision swayed and she grabbed onto Anakin's arm, trying to steady herself. She felt sick and frustrated, but now wasn't the time to break or lose her temper.

Her family was on the precipice. They needed something - or someone - to bring them together.

"You are her father." she tipped her head back, "She is your daughter. We've been given a gift. Both of our children can finally know you...and me. Right now, she doesn't know you. She has only met the Anakin that is poisoned by the Sith mindset. Do you blame her for being cautious? For being angry?"

[ignite_the_stars]

“That not what I’m getting at, Padmé.” He hadn’t judged Leia’s contempt for him he was only pointing out the way things were. “Just because you say it, doesn’t make it true. She doesn’t love me, she doesn’t want to know me, so stop trying to lie to me about it. You were given a gift, I wasn’t.”

[padme_amidala]

It was too much. Padmé launched herself forward and wrapped her arms around his waist, trying to hold him; trying to protect him. If she could rip out her heart and share what she had been given, she would. Without thinking.

"She needs time. You need time." her voice was forcefully steady, "I believe in both of you. And, until you make amends, I will love you."

Her stubborn, too strong for her own good daughter and her stubborn, too strong for his own good husband would find a path to meet...and connect.

[ignite_the_stars]

“Padmé-”

Before learning about his future he’d believed there would always be hope, a way for things to work out right. But his future was too bleak; there was no hope in all of that. And he couldn’t look at his daughter and pretend everything would eventually work out, he couldn’t delude himself about that. All he would be doing was delaying the heartache.

But he held onto Padmé because her arms comforted him. He needed to hear he was loved over and over again until he could convince himself he deserved it. That was a long way off still.

“You shouldn’t be here. You should go back.”

[padme_amidala]

"I believe in both of you." she wasn't going to - no, she couldn't - give up on hope. It was all they had in Luceti. Whether or not that hope transitioned to their universe wasn't something she wanted to think about; it was beyond her reach.

"I can't imagine how much pain you feel, Ani. I'm not going to pretend I do." but she knew it was the sort of pain that left a permanent scar even when it was healed, "Even so, there is nothing you can say that will keep me from you."

For one desperate moment, she pressed close, breathing in his scent. She needed this - perhaps not as much as him - but her heart ached for it - and the pain was all too familiar.

"I'll come here. You deserve to stay where you are most comfortable." she stepped back and rested her hands on his chest, "And if you need anything, call for me over the journals."

[ignite_the_stars]

When Padmé started to pull away, it took all of Anakin’s will power to let her go. He wanted to resist and pull her close, to go back on his decision to stay away from her. It was painful letting his arms fall.

Even so, his hand caught Padmé’s before she withdrew it to maintain this fleeting connection. He knew if he spoke he would cave and beg her to stay.

He nodded and then let go of her hand.