lucetilogs | y'all know what this is for....

y'all know what this is for....

Who: EVERYONE
What: SHENANIGANS
When: ANY OLD TIME (between Jan 24 and Jan 30 anyhoot)
Where: EVERYWHERE
Summary: Everyone becomes that which they love, covet, adore, or otherwise desire, and it ends exceptionally well for every single person involved. Hooray!
Rating: Who even knows. Anywhere from G to R, I would suppose.

No cut for this -- this is a MASS INTERACTION POST for the You Are What You Love event! For those of you who don't want to have to post up actual entries in your characters' journals (though you are of course still free to do that), this is the place to be all week if you just want to toss out random shenanigans! (Or more serious shenanigans. Or whatever brand of shenanigans you prefer, really.) There's no real need to state your date/location in the subject line of your tag, but you may feel free to do so!

Please threadjack like bosses, and above all, have fun! ♥

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

If you're wanting another go 'round, you only have to ask.

[Although Jack is suspecting that he does not want to sleep with this Buffy. But trolling? Oh yes.]

NO! Not--NO! [A huff. Jack has a surprisingly GOOD huffy Buffy impression, probably because he sees it so much. It's almost automatic. He nearly crashes through the door of the shop in his haste to make this conversation go away. Yet morbid curiosity spurs it on.]

I'd never have thought you and I---I wouldn't have predicted that, Horner.

Women can't resist the Jack charm. I'm sure you've had your way with pirate Jack a few times by now.

[Jack will open the door so 'Buffy' doesn't have to crash into it. Having figured out who this Buffy is, he's going to do his own interrogation.]

[WHAT.]

OH. Ah. Yes, pirate Jack and I have...aye, numerous times. Sometimes more than once a day, even.

[He smirks knowingly.]

Must keep you real busy, that.

You've no idea, mate. Right. Clothing, clothing......[Jack looks forlornly at racks of wenches' clothing. What to choose, even?]

Having trouble picking something out?

Well it's all very confusing, isn't it. How does she do it, I ask you.

Yeah... how does she do it? Why don't you show me?

We're both speaking of her way with clothes, and not some other thing which I am now trying to unthink because Sparrow's brain is not capable of withstanding such utter skullfunkery, are we not?

Finally decided to come around to admitting you're not Buffy?

...Aye. Her feet. They do not and nor will they ever fit into these boots. Now what would you suggest?

Boots. Thigh high boots. [He spots some nearby and retrieves them.] Why cover only your ankles when you can cover past your knees?

Stockings. If you have lady legs, it's important people are looking at them. [Item retrieved!]

A skirt. Since your legs are so well protected, we don't need a long one, do we? [Black miniskirt retrieved!]

Even a modest lady like Buffy needs some support. [He retrieves a bra. A woefully sad one. Also bigger than her size.] A pair of socks will make them look bigger. [Those? Collected.] And look here, a matching lace thong.

Bit nippy outside. A turtleneck should do. [A nice tight

Should get you started, right?

Edited 2011-01-25 03:49 (UTC)

[Sparrow gathers the things and enters the dressing room. Things fly out over the door: coat, trousers, boots, shirt, belts. From beneath the door, anyone outside might witness the feet of the slayer turning carefully, as though whoever was in there was growing a little obsessed with the mirror. Finally the first of the items Horner gave Jack slips off the door in the hands of the one inside. It's the thong.]

What's this for then.

It's underwear, Buffy-Jack. The thin side goes in the back. It keeps people from getting a look up your skirt.

[And fairly impractical in the winter, but hey.]

[There is a "BLIMEY" and some muttering. The feet pick up, one at a time, as Jack tries to step into the thong. Then there is utter silence.]

[...]

Everything okay in there?

This might be the best day of my weary life, Jack Horner. And I owe it all to you. And the Malnosso. And Buffy.

...

And the thong.

Glad I could help. Now why don't you step out of there and share some of the good cheer?

No. MY special moment. Mine. [Jack might actually accidentally kick the door back open behind him now--just briefly, it swings shut again--as he reaches down and fumbles about for the stockings. Have fun, Horner.]

[He just has to remember this is Buffy's body, not a man in a woman's body. That firmly in mind, that brief glimpse is recorded in his mind. Overall? Worth it.]

[Jack, meanwhile, is blissfully unaware that Horner got a look. He is trying to get the stockings on.] Oi! You had to grab a pair with suspenders? Hrmph. These look like fishermen's nets. [The feet disappear, one at a time, and then there is another silent round of stare-at-the-mirror. The other clothes follow quickly but soon Jack emerges with apparently super-sized boobs.]

I dunno, mate---this don't look right to me.

Oh, I'd say it looks perfect. [He tosses a scarf over.]

There, that'll complete the look. Buffy may want to start taking fashion tips from you.

[Jack looks down at himself, pleased.] I'm having a thought, Horner. Don't you think Buffy normally wears a bit more?

I usually don't see her with this much on.

y'all know what this is for....

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[action] Masa you pimp

[action] Just doing my job

[action] you shop him out so well

[action] buffy will be so proud

[action] soooooooo proud

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[action] What you gon' do with all that junk?

[action] Can always find a use, I s'pect

[Action] All that junk inside that trunk?

[Action] I have no idea what you speak of!

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