lucetilogs | School Log!

Who: OPEN! Anyone! Teachers, Students, anyone dropping in for the open classes, anyone at the battledome (from about 1-3 pm), newcomers with questions, etc!
What: Catchall school days
When: March! (You can vary the dates if you'd like, if you want something from last week or on the 17th and onward, it's fairly open there.)
(Classes run from 9 AM-roughly 2:30 PM, and the log can include before and after-school activities)
Where: School / Battle Dome
Summary: It's been a quiet few weeks in Luceti, but school is still in session!
Rating: A+

[For some sense of guidelines:

- Anyone joining for the first time is allowed to poke around and ask questions and (possibly) take or have handwaved taking a test so they can join in immediately!

- The playground is open for after school or lunch break interactions. The cafeteria is also open. Also, random classrooms are available for students wanting to use it for private tutoring/study hall sessions/club meetings whatnot.

- World Sharing and Magic lessons are held at the battle dome, so non-attendees can observe if they like.

- You're not limited to the headers! Just do what you want--these are just some suggestions as to what's going on, but they aren't the be-all-and-end-all of what can be played with! Chat with each other, set up things! It's meant to be for CR!]

As always, please add your character to the roster here and update if there are any changes! Also, students/magic class participants, please respond here when you have a chance! Thank you!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Small victory, that. It's very rare that people are willing to take big risks on the first day, and she's definitely struggling with this a lot.]

That's good. I think it'll do some good.

[It won't make her less of a terrible person. Rue pushes the hair out of her face, hardly noticing when it falls forward all over again.]

Why did you start talking to me about it?

[Billy purses his lips at that, quiet for a moment. That could potentially be a difficult question, but... looking at her now, remembering what she'd said, it's not that difficult at all.]

Because... you called yourself a terrible person. I wanted to see for myself if it was true.

[What a tiny reason. Rue hunches, wondering at his feelings now that he knows so much of the truth after all.]

Has this been proof enough?

...Yeah, I think so. I've seen plenty.

[It's familiar, actually; it makes him remember all too clearly how he felt about himself for a long time. That helps him believe that maybe, with some work, she'll do okay.]

I think you're an unhappy person who's done terrible things... things that you regret. But terrible people, in general, don't regret what they've done. So there's that.

You think I'm not terrible just because I have regret for what I've done?

[When she thinks about it that way...well, the Raven doesn't regret any decisions other than raising her. Rue folds her arms around herself, shivering.]

I think there's a big difference between being a bad person and making a mistake.

[Why is it so hard to convince him that she is as awful as she knows she is? Seated at a desk now, Rue drops her head into her hands and grabs fistfuls of hair.]

I make too many mistakes.

It isn't up to you to decide how much is too much. Even if you think you're worthless, other people can still see someone they want to be with. Trust me on that.

[He'd thought that getting himself out of the way for Teddy's sake would help. It had taken a lot of work to convince him otherwise, but he'd have never been able to do it alone. His worth, for a long time now, has stemmed from other people accepting his mistakes. He can't see why she would be any different.]

[And why should she? Why should she trust him, this boy who decided he cared all of a sudden, and knew all her secret worries and had answers for every single one? That's suspicious if she has ever met suspicious in her life.

Except he has those answers because he knows the questions.]

You really believe that.

[He looks straight at her, his gaze serious, even if she won't look at him.]

I do. Wholeheartedly.

Well, I don't know if I do.

[Rue crosses her arms, a better defense than such weak words. Why can't she just tell him she wants it to be true? Why is it always so easy and never that easy at the same time?]

That's okay... to an extent. Sometimes it takes a while to learn that your life has value. Sometimes you need more people believing in you. But it's something to work on, isn't it?

[Believing her life has value? Only one person ever even implied it. Rue swallows hard, whispers something so softly it doesn't make words; when she tries again, the words are different.]

I don't know anymore.

...So... you build a support system, then. Friends. Classmates. Allies. People who can give a damn until you can, too.

That isn't as easy as you seem to believe. [First and foremost because she does not deserve to be so supported, by anyone; second because none of them can love her anyway.]

Well, I don't think it's as hard as you believe, either.

[He hesitates, then offers his hand out to her.]

So here's one, to start.

[If you want.]

[Her eyes say it first: who are you to think I want you to give a damn? Then, face reddening, she looks at the floor, his hand, the floor again. Both of her hands close into fists.]

I can't ask you to do that. [For me, I can't ask you to do that for me. Rue's arms shake with the force of resisting her desire to let him care.] But-

[That's a slip. She shouldn't have said anything else.]

[Billy waits for a moment, to see if she finishes. He doesn't put his hand down.]

...Technically, you haven't asked.

[Almost without her consent, her hand just barely brushes his.]

But why- do you want to?

[He makes no move to take it, not yet- just allows the touch and waits to see if she makes a decision.]

Why wouldn't I? You seem like you need it. We're all stuck in this place together- we should help each other, whenever we can.

[Well that's just great. She really seems that pitiful to other people? Enough for one of them to drag her off into a separate classroom and tell her she's not really as terrible as she thinks she is?

Rue's face closes off to Billy, but her hand remains in his. She can't deny she asked for this, in her own way.]

[He's not entirely sure of her answer, but the way she's holding his hand is enough of a hint for him to feel slightly encouraged.

Which thinks, belatedly, that he's never given her his name. They'd both taken a chance on each other based on nothing but the terribleness they were trying to leave behind.

Sometimes the last step is the first. He gives her hand a light squeeze.]

I'm Billy, and... I'd like to be your friend, if you'll have me.

[I don't have friends.

I don't need friends.

I don't need anyone else.

Rue closes her eyes, breathes, opens them again so she can look at Billy without faltering so much.]

I can try.

School Log!

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