lucetilogs | spice is the variety of death...? idek

spice is the variety of death...? idek

Who: Everyone who wants to be here! ...Again!
What: Total Recall 2014, Part 2
When: The second week of the event, roughly April 17th-22nd. As in the last log, the start date is flexible. The end date less so.
Where: All over blah blah blah
Summary: More chaos, more madness, everyone is just so done with this nonsense gosh
Rating: Varied. Anything too high-rated goes to appointments!

Slow but steady, here is the second log for the event. As before, feel free to have your characters post their own entries if you'd rather do that. Here is the first log as well.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Hah. Who here would I harm? Aang and Katara already forced me to promise I would set aside vengeance for now. Other than the few from the Fire Nation here, I don't have anyone I would hate.

[He shrugs.] I don't have a reason to hurt myself either. I survived prison camps and torture for fifteen years. I'm hardly going to finish their job for them, now am I?

Then why cut yourself?

[It didn't make any sense. From what she'd observed and read about the bending world, no one really ever harmed themselves to get their powers to work.]

Blood.

[He knows he can unsettle people when he's not pretending to be someone else. He's come to like it. It means people keep their distance and leave him alone.]

One thing you learn after years held captive in the desert is that water is still everywhere. And then you do what you must in order to survive.

Edited (typos fffffffff) 2014-05-11 06:30 (UTC)

[She raises an eyebrow despite herself. The human body is a high percentage of water, so does that mean water benders can also bend the water within a person's body? That requires more research and a great deal more caution.]

I see. I can appreciate a survivalist mentality, even if it means drawing your own blood to do it.

You can't be squeamish if you want to survive. I was the only one that did, because I was lucky as well.

[Because he'd been willing to quite literally do anything. He shrugs.]

So I might as well keep up the habit here, I suppose. [Because what else will he do? He doesn't have anything else left. And now he has no purpose, but he's been trying to avoid that horrible fact by keeping himself busy perfecting his already perfect technique.]

[She nods faintly. Luck certainly has a lot to do with it, but not all. You have to be ruthless; and apparently even this version of him is.]

You don't have to, however. It isn't as if your skills will dull over time here.

Any skill unpracticed goes dull, and far more quickly than you think. What a silly thing to tell someone.

[Honestly.]

What skills are you letting go to rust?

My sense of disbelief.

[She shakes her head.]

There are things here far too strange to even try to comprehend.

Many things are impossible to comprehend. [His lips twist with old, remembered pain.] Comprehension is optional. Endurance is not.

And do you think your endurance will fade simply by being here?

[Loki hesitates. It's not a question he's asked himself at all before.]

If I allow myself to be distracted. [It's another good excuse to avoid people.] Though there seems to be plenty to endure here as well.

Hah. Though to what purpose is always the more important question.

I would think the purpose would be not to lose ourselves.

[She moves her arms behind her back in a typically relaxed military stance.]

It's easy to do that here - either to the past or the future.

[But isn't that part of what 15 years of torture and imprisonment sought to do to him? Destroy his sense of self, his identity as a water bender? All the more reason for him to practice, and fiercely.]

How do you go about that?

For one?

[She motions to his surroundings.]

I don't let them stop me from getting out among people. Sticking to our old patterns just means we're still stuck. If I decided to stay as I was, you'd never see me.

I suppose I'm glad that it works for you.

I don't like people. [He used to like people. He used to be flirtatious, and garrulous, and renowned as a story teller. His stories dried up entirely in the desert. And he finds he no longer wants to be around people any longer, because what good would it do to befriend any of them? This place is only a temporary prison. He's had enough loss.]

[She shrugs a little.] It has so far.

And somehow that sounds hollow to me. It sounds more like you don't want to like them.

[He crosses his arms over his chest.]

That's a very subtle difference to hear.

It's a pointless exercise here anyway, though, isn't it? We all come and go at someone else's whim, just like any other prison.

I have experience.

[She was trained to read and understand people so she could better manipulate them, after all. That and her memory from the last time Loki hadn't been himself was resurfacing with a vengeance.]

I suppose it could be pointless if you think in terms of that. However, you could be stuck here for years. It's easier to survive with people at your back.

That would depend on the people.

[His lips set in a grim line.] Because they're just as likely to get you killed.

I know someone who would say it's worth it, depending on the person.

[Steve sacrificed himself for cities full of people he didn't even know. He was better than all of them, in a way.]

[Loki shrugs.] I didn't manage to get killed for my own children. [Though he had tried. He had tried very, very hard that day. His voice comes out sounding a little odd to his own ears.]

So it seems a bit more important to survive and see them avenged.

And one day, you might. [Any parent would want that. It would consume them and eat them from the inside.]

But that won't happen here. And they wouldn't want you to fall, would they?

Of all things, family is the most important to my tribe. [And that's something he can't quite escape. Aang and Katara convinced him to give up on his vengeance, but he can't help but feel he's let down his tribe, his family, his children by doing so.

And so what else is left? Nothing. That's all he's been able to come up with: nothing. So he's thrown himself into practice. Loki shrugs] And I've had to promise to give up my vengeance.

[She can't imagine what it must be like to lose a family. She's still single, but she remembers how her family reacted to her joining the military in the midst of a war. Their mix of pride and fear had been almost palpable.]

Then live to honor them. It seems cliché, but when you're stuck here, there is little else we can do until we return.

[Everyone always says those things, as if it's easy, or simple. He really feels like yelling at this strange man. Or perhaps better yet, throwing him into the stream.

But there's also only so long he can avoid this one question.

Loki abruptly sits on a nearby fallen tree, elbows propped in his knees.]

Maybe I'm too tired for that.

spice is the variety of death...? idek

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