Theirs not to make reply, Theirs not to reason why, Theirs but to do and die:

[all7seas]

Who: noprevaricating, hippocraticly, lists_to_port
What: Two Eighteenth-century Sailors and the Tractor That Didn't Love Them. And McCoy, covering his eyes.
When: Day 1 of the Draft; after this.
Where: A farm near the battlefield, and its surrounds.
Summary: Jack and Archie have decided to tend to matters of war, in spite of difficulties caused by shifting irregularities.
Rating: Jim Varney wearing John Goodman's trousers and Jed Clampett's hat.



The first thing Jack Sparrow noticed after being transported to the battlefield with the rest was what amounted to excruciating pain in his right arm.

His sword arm.

It dangled from his shoulder, badly broken and useless. And pink.

On his knees in a pile of dusty straw, Jack inspected the damage, and found it very bad indeed; he found he could not feel the fingers on his right hand at all. Clutching the useless limb to his chest, he looked about. "KENNEDY! BONES!" Where were they in this chaos?

...

And why was he COMPLETELY PINK?

Comments

[all7seas]

"Might I offer the opinion that if it saves our lives this day it is a very good one indeed and, by the bye, Archie, you're quite a fine shot."

[hippocraticly.livejournal.com]

"You've got it on the wrong setting." Or the right one, depending on the priorities of the man holding the weapon.

[simplestgift]

Another flying soldier VAPORIZED! "It seems to be working fine, Doctor!" At least, it was doing a weapon's intended purpose....

[all7seas]

Sparrow was getting very restless, mostly because by now he really wanted to shoot something as well. "Time is fleeting, o futuristic physician! My arm, sir! Hurting. Mending?"

[hippocraticly.livejournal.com]

"Just give me a few more minutes... something is interfering with my damn equipment." It was clear from his tone that he blamed the pirate.

[simplestgift]

"A Shifter?" Archie squints up at the sky, but can't tell from this distance if there are any Shifters up in the sky. Well, he can always just fry them all.

[all7seas]

"Bloody...My kingdom for a horse, eh? Get us right out of this place. Circling. Circling like bloody carrion birds. Kennedy, firing 'em down. Me, winged. Bollocks."

[hippocraticly.livejournal.com]

McCoy shrugged. He had no idea, but blamed the irregularities that had currently made his companions blue and pink.

[simplestgift]

Kennedy zapped another soldier, enjoying this a little too much. "You don't have to reload, there's no shot, no powder, no smoke. And they're still coming in faster than I can shoot!" He edged toward the door of a nearby barn, then peered in. "Ha-HA!" He lowered the phaser and darted into the barn, disappearing out of sight.

[all7seas]

"You ever wonder, Bonesy, whether Kennedy's a bit berserk? Because I do. Am. Now."

[hippocraticly.livejournal.com]

"Kennedy, come back here with my phaser!"

[simplestgift]

No response from inside the barn, but it sounded like something was going on. After a moment... "I found something better than Beastie!"

[all7seas]

"OI! Better be the Black Pearl, then, Kennedy! No old hay carts for Sparrow!"

[hippocraticly.livejournal.com]

McCoy heaved a sigh. Was anyone listening to him on this damn draft? At all?

[simplestgift]

After a couple of minutes, Archie appeared from the barn, grinning like a maniac and leading three brown horses.

[all7seas]

"Kennedy? I think I like you, mate. Any ponies for your Dawn in there?"

[hippocraticly.livejournal.com]

... "Horses."

[simplestgift]

"Yes, horses. They still have horses in your time, don't they?"

[all7seas]

The pink-skinned pirate pulled away from McCoy, then. His arm felt...better. He wasn't ready to use it as he normally would, but it didn't feel so broken anymore. He walked right up to Kennedy and took the reins of one of the horses, which had a shock of black main sticking straight up out of its neck. "I like this one. I shall call him Norry."

GOD THIS TAG IS HIDEOUS

[hippocraticly.livejournal.com]

"I love horses."

McCoy was delighted as he also got up and also went over to one of the horses with a smile on his face. He refrained from hugging the damn thing and opted stroke its nose affectionately instead.

[simplestgift]

Archie gave a gigantic purply-blue smile to see the doctor so pleased by his offering, giving the first smile he'd seen from him in a while. Then, with a glance up at the sky, he cleared his throat. "Best be on the move, then."

[all7seas]

"That's not what you're meant to say, Kennedy. You're meant to say, 'WE RIDE.' Just like that." Jack swung aboard Norry's back. "Then you gallop off heroically."

[hippocraticly.livejournal.com]

"Do you two ever know how to ride a horse?"

[simplestgift]

In response, Kennedy mounted with...well, a degree of ease, anyway. "It's been a while, but it's not something one forgets. Now, for galloping away heroically." He gave another glance at the sky, where soldiers were beginning to amass again, turned the horse around, and began to ride away.

[all7seas]

"RIDE ON, NORRY ME LAD! I SPUR YOU FORTH WITH MY BRAVE WORDS AND THE PROMISE OF A CARROT AT DAY'S END." And off galloped Jack Sparrow...in a completely different direction.