lucetilogs | Chaos Plot Reactions!

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Chaos Plot Reactions!

Who: Anyone/Everyone affected by Helios' nasty bout of Possession Sickness
What: Picking up the pieces
When: August 11th/12th
Where: Wherever there was bad mojo!
Summary: Apep, an Egyptian god of Chaos, possessed Helios and wrecked havoc. Those involved are going to have to cope with their injuries, mental traumas, and newfound night terrors!
Rating: R, for possible trigger warnings for descriptions of violence and bad language.

Nothing is ever easy for them House 46 folks. Gawddamn!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ And here is Helios stiffening like a board and then not answering right away. He is just...not going to look at you Harry after getting an initial look at your wounds. Gods he's the one that did that. He's the one responsible for all that and it's strange to even see Harry asking to help him. He is far too guilt ridden to look at you after everything he's done to you. So he stops, if only briefly, and shakes his head. ] N-No. I-I'm fine.

[ Said in a fast little whisper as he continues to walk. ]

... Oh, hell. Okay. This was gonna be a little tougher.

So instead, I caught up to him- limping a bit, but doing my best to hide it- until I was close enough to rest a hand on his shoulder.

"You sure? Maybe you should take a break. C'mon, we can go grab drinks."

[ The hand on his shoulder makes him gear up for so many things. So many terrible and horrible things that he truly thinks he deserves right now. It's not Harry in those few seconds that grabs his shoulder but his brother. Helios flinches visibly and hunches away at the touch.

He shakes his head never once looking back at the other man behind him trying to help him even after what he's done. ] Y-Yes. I-I'm fine. I-I should, should finish up here. S-Sorry.

[ He doesn't so much as move but Harry can probably feel Helios' shoulders shaking slightly and see him gnawing on his lower lip gently if not a bit harder than normal. He really doesn't feel like drinking or eating. He hasn't had the stomach for it to be honest. ] I-I have to go. I'm s-sorry.

"Helios. Please."

I dropped the attempts at being cheerful.

"Talk to me?"

[ And there is where Helios stops and falters in his movements. His shoulders hunch and his body shakes slightly at Harry using his name. His name that when the other had used it caused him to resurface for that brief second and the pain was all but unbearable.

He doesn't look at the other man when he gives a shaky breath and tries to control himself to the point where he can actually speak without his voice cracking. ] N-No. I-I'm, I'm fine. I-I don't want t-to waste any of your time.

[ It might be unfair, it probably is, but he really doesn't know what to say. He doesn't know what to say to anyone he's encounter today. The guilt, the shame, the utter pain was all very apparent when you looked at him. It was almost tangible in its form permeating off him like its own aura. ] I-I'm s-sorry for, for everything.

"How would it be wasting my time when I'm the one asking you to talk, man?"

I moved to get into his path and force myself back into his line of vision. It was aggressive, and I felt like an asshole for doing it, but he needed to hear this.

"This wasn't your fault. Period."

[ He flinches and stops lest he run into the other man. He doesn't meet Harry's gaze with his own green eyed one. He doesn't really seem to have the nerve to. And those words aren't helping either. ] It is. It-it's all my f-fault.

[ Because Apep wouldn't even have been an issue if it weren't for what he did back home. ] I-I knew about it. I-I just- [ he bites his lip blinking away that burning sensation. ] -I-I didn't know that this could happen.

[ So clearly it is all his fault. Removing himself from people's presences is the only solution in case it happens again. So that is what he's going to do. ]

"... Oh, jesus, man. Let me tell you all the ways that things I've done might have inadvertently led to somebody getting hurt."

He didn't want to meet my eyes? That was fine. I didn't think the poor guy could really handle a soulgaze right now. I just wanted him to hear me.

"Helios, you were possessed. You're as much a victim as anybody else is. Half of the reason Apep was doing what he did is to torment you with this exact guilt you're feeling right now."

[ He hunches even more and takes a small step backwards, shaking his head as he does so. ] No. I-I'm not.

[ He isn't a victim, is he? He's a monster and he's not sure why people keep telling him otherwise. He fights back another sob at those words. He can't do this right now Harry. He's so used to having the blame put on him that all these people saying its not him is just...not making any sense. He knows the other man's words have merit and truth to them but it doesn't excuse what he's done and all the people he's inadvertently hurt. ] It-it doesn't change wh-what he did.

[ And it doesn't help all the injuries everyone has now either. ]

"No. But it doesn't mean it's your fault. It just means you have as much right as anybody to be pissed at the person who really did it."

I softened my voice a little bit.

"... Helios, please. Don't do this, man. I'm worried about you."

Y-You don't have to be. I-I'll be fine. [ Another shaky breath. He is not going to breakdown here. Nope. Not allowing himself to. He was fine. He was just bruised unlike other people he ran across. He'll work around this on his own. He might not be seen for awhile but, well, it was probably for the best when he thought about. ]

"No. You won't. Not if you blame yourself for this crap. You'll drive yourself crazy with the guilt and self-loathing, and nothing will come of it."

This... was gonna be tougher than I thought, apparently.

"I do have some experience in this particular arena, y'know."

I-I'm not going t-to do that. I-I just need some time...

[ Lies. But he is going to try not to even if it isn't going to be his best effort when he does. ] Wh-why? Why d-do want to help me? I-I hurt you, I-I took your energy.

[ He doesn't really understand it. And his voice cracks slightly when he asks that. He might move slightly away some more. ] You d-don't have to help m-me.

"If I didn't help anybody unless I had to, Chicago would be a haven of the Red Court of Vampires and the White Council Headquarters in Edinburgh would be a tomb. And I pretty much hate the White Council. They're a bunch of stuffy, hidebound misanthropes who, if they saw me on fire in the middle of the road, would as soon throw lighter fluid on me as water."

I shrugged.

"You're my friend, and I actually like you. If they deserve my help, so do you."

[ The Magic Council didn't like him either. They almost put him to death for this entire thing as it was. But, no, instead they let him suffer without Elise and with his soul in shambles so he understands Harry probably more than he should, really. ] O-Oh. I-I'm sorry.

[ He just...shakes his head and takes another rattling shake breath at those words. Compassion is not an easy thing for him to accept Harry. Friendship is another, especially when he hasn't known you long and he goes and does this. He is trying very hard not to get upset and breakdown but you are making it very hard on him bro. He's at a loss for words or maybe it's because his throat is far too tight to say the ones he means to say. Thank you doesn't really cut it though, does it? Either way he just looks away and tries to blink back quickly forming tears. ]

"Nothing to be sorry for. Sometimes people are assholes. My point is, I don't think you're one of them.

If you want time alone to heal, if you want to work out the frustration or the anger or the pain, whatever you want to do, that's fine. But don't expect me or anybody else in this village to hate you."

[ Another shaky sigh as he looks away and nods. He'll wipe at his eyes there and then to try and catch those few brief tears as they fall. ] I-I don't know what to say...

[ He swallows thickly. ] Th-thank you doesn't s-seem good enough. [ It really isn't, he knows, but what else can he possibly do? ]

"You don't have to say anything, man. Just promise me that if you need anything, even just to talk, you'll let me know. Or let somebody know, if you don't want to ask me."

[ Helios lets out a small shaky sigh. Talking. Was never his best point or his most easiest to fall into. But he knows he can't do this alone. He just can't do it and he realizes that now. It hurts to admit and he hates himself for not being stronger and able to handle something like this by himself. But he knows that he has people here who care and who want to help him, for whatever reasons, and he's not sure he can push them away. ] I-I don't want t-to, to b-bother you with th-this though. N-Not anymore than I-I already have.

[ There's a small stifled sob as he shakes his head. He doesn't want to bother anyone at the moment, not after what he's done. ] I-I can't...I can't do it-

[ the admission is outright painful to admit and it clearly shows in his voice and hunched, defeated, posture. ] -I can't do it a-alone.

Edited 2012-08-16 06:54 (UTC)

"Isn't it lucky for you you don't have to."

I tried to smile a bit, just to lighten the mood.

"Now, you sure I can't interest you in a drink?"

I'm a-anything but lucky, really. [ A small choked back laugh at that. Lucky isn't the best word to use. Perhaps blessed and honored to have such caring people around him. But, no, this isn't like back home he knows that. Back home he would have had to but here? Helios shakes his head. ]

I-I don't...I don't drink v-very often. [ Maybe a glass of wine once in awhile but never anything strong. He turns a little to regard Harry then for the first time they've spoken. ] I-I don't...r-really know if I-I'd be the best of c-company for that s-sort of thing. [ He can't drink tea, can he? ]

"Yeah, usually luck isn't something that happens to me, and yet I seem to have gotten off light this time. We all have at least a hint of good luck sometimes. I'm just hoping to be one of yours, yeah?"

I grinned and went to clap him on the shoulder, but remembered, roughly mid-swing, what his reaction to that had been earlier. I awkwardly stopped and let my hand fall again.

"And you don't have to drink alcohol, man, we can just grab coffee or something. Tea, if that's what you're into. Just... to relax. Unwind. Chill. Be zen, or whatever."

[ Another choked up little laugh at that. He supposes Harry is then. He doesn't notice the other moving his hand to clap him on the shoulder but he'd probably apologize for making it hard to offer some semblance of comfort. Helios just sighs and closes his eyes briefly, nodding. ] O-Oh. I-I suppose if, if you really w-want to.

[ He'll look at his things and then back at the house. ] I-I should just...finish up here though.

"Sure. I'll lend a hand."

... Okay, this was gonna suck, given how bad I ached, but fuck it, Helios was worth it.

N-No! No you, you d-don't have to do that. [ He might sound a bit hard in his conviction, whoops. He did not mean for that. ] Y-You're still...r-recovering. I, I can do it later.

[ He doesn't want you to push yourself bro, not on his behalf, especially not on his behalf. ]

Chaos Plot Reactions!

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HOLY MEANT TO SEND THIS BEFORE WORK, BATMAN

How dare yoooou forget! >:C

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