EVENT LOG: ON TODAY'S EPISODE...

[lucetimods]

Who: Everyone and everyone's evil twin.
What: Drama! Romance! Gripping soliloquies! Otherwise known as our SOAP OPERA EVENT.
When: April 26th - April 30th
Where: All 'round town and coming to a TV guide near you.
Summary: For more information, see this post.
Rating: Keep it PGish! Take anything too raunchy to your appointments posts, darlings.

Log for any and all events around town during the event. But also feel free to do your own posts as well! And yes, this will be the only mass log for the whole weekend.

HAVE FUN.

Comments

[All days, pick a scenario!]

[dragoon_pride]

[EVERYTHING is a dramatic moment for Kain throughout the experiment. He pretty much ends up in tears over anything that would normally not bother him. The wind is blowing from a new direction? Crying. Dropped his lance somehow? Bawling like a little girl. And so on. Catch him in this overdramatic state at any time, along with any other option...]

[Option 1.]

[He's frequently around town everywhere holding up signs indicating some stunning revelations (choose whichever!):

A. I am your father.
B. I killed your father.
C. I've actually been a woman all along.
D. I've been having an intense love affair with someone in your house.]

Option 2.

[He's also experiencing random deaths all over the place! Kain is having unusually bad luck, dying of things that might seem rather... stupid to die of, including (choose whichever!):

A. A paper cut :|
B. An rare disease that makes him literally swoon on the ground and write out long, dramatic last words
C. Allergic reaction to... crying. Whoops, since he's doing that a lot he'll be in trouble.
D. Tripping and falling on his own spear. Somehow.
E. ...WANT TO KILL HIM? That can be arranged as well, the more dramatic the better!]

[1...and later 2?]

[mistlegacy]

[Rydia slipped away from bed early to visit the grocery store (feel free to have bawled about that, Kain), and thus missed some interesting times at the house. On her way back, she spots Kain and heads over, raising an eyebrow at the freshly changed sign.

....what.]

You're not my father, Kain. That's not remotely possible.

[Also, ew.]

[awesome works for me!]

[dragoon_pride]

[Kain's eyes are red from the crying- she left him. His own wife stepped out on him! Surely to see another man. He knows this has to be true, he sees the signs all over the place.]

I was just as appalled as you.

[He glances at the sign he's holding up, frowning a little.]

Actually that's not true.

[And with a completely serious expression...]

I'm technically your MOTHER.

[mistlegacy]

[Rydia just stares, not even able to form a coherent response for a moment.]

No. You're not.

...just what do those other cards say? Let me see.

[Even though she almost doesn't want to, but she'd better know what he's been flashing around town.]

[dragoon_pride]

But I am. I know it's a difficult revelation, but... I got the results. Truly, I am, or once was, a woman. Look at my nailpolish, Rydia.

[Because that is HARD PROOF AND EVIDENCE.]

[Reluctantly, he hands the cards over.]

You're the one who left ME, need I remind you.

[mistlegacy]

[Siiiiigh. Seriously?]

I left to get groceries! I couldn't even have been gone for more than half an hour, if that. And I think I'd know by now if you were a woman.

[She flips through the other flashcards, frowning, then stuffs them away in the grocery bag.]

No more of this nonsense. You're coming home with me. No more flashing these around to everyone.

[dragoon_pride]

Just tell me straight out if you want a divorce. I can handle it.

[Kain is not operating by the same logic as her, and he continues.]

I saw the hints, don't lie to me. You're seeing someone else!

[2]

[couldibeanymorefonic]

[Colonel Jade Curtiss approaches Kain from behind, under the cover of dusk. He has a trenchcoat donned, with his hands in his pockets.]

Excuse me. I'd like a word, if you will.

[dragoon_pride]

[Kain jumps in surprise, but he's got the reflex enough to turn around and hold his spear up defensively. "What is it?"]

[couldibeanymorefonic]

[Jade stops and takes just a step back - surveying the man's reaction and reflexes cafrefully.]

Just some simple questions. That's all. I'd like to know who you are and what you think you're currently doing.

[dragoon_pride]

['What business is it of yours?' Kain glares, looking highly offended at being forced to answer someone's questions. But, he does have some replies prepared, anyway, holding up a card with the response,]

I killed your father.

[...He's convinced this stunning revelation is true, anyway.]

[couldibeanymorefonic]

[His eyes widen slightly. And one hand disappears into his sleeve for a moment.]

That's all I needed to know.

[And his hand emerges from his sleeve, now holding a revolver aimed squarely at Kain's chest.]

[dragoon_pride]

[Kain stands his ground, prepared to fight if it really comes to that. But he's not so sure he can dodge at such close range.]

If you kill me now, you'll never know what he told me.

I choose all the signs! All of them!

[paladinlost]

You're wrong, Kain.

[Here comes the voice of sanity, with his manly hair and manly looks and manly armor and manly manskirt and- aaaaaargh my eyes.]

I always knew that you were having an intense love affair with your dragon, that you were secretly a beautiful maiden and that you killed my father in a tragic yet amusing time-travelling accident, but you are not my father.

[Hopefully not, considering the first three points.]

You are...

YAAAAAY EXCELLENT XD

[dragoon_pride]

I am your father's second cousin-in-law twice removed's sister, I believe.

[Kain sighs heavily.]

I thought I hid most of it well all of this time, especially the truth about... my womanhood. I don't know how I'll tell Rydia.

[Tears fall from his eyes as he thinks about that, she probably will want a divorce considering he's been living a lie all this time.]

[paladinlost]

Father's second cousin-in-law thrice removed's ex-husband's sister, actually. You'd think Golbez would have mentioned it at some point.

[Really rude of him not to do so, he must say.]

Don't be ridiculous; she must have figured it out by now. You've been living together for years, sleeping in the same bed. Unless you've somehow managed to... fake...

[No, he cannot have those thoughts! Rosa would never forgive him! ...Besides, that's way much more than he'd like to know about anyone's sex life, thank you.]

[dragoon_pride]

There are ways of faking everything, Cecil. EVERYTHING.

[Bawww whatever is he going to do? It's dreadfully upsetting. He shakes his head, trying to clear his eyes.]

Anyway, I'm certain that's not right, what you've said. I think I'm actually related to your uncle's cousin's twin's fourth wife. A dancing girl in town, I believe.

[That's how he can poledance so well really.]

[paladinlost]

...Heavens help me, if you try to say you're not a true blond or dragoon I'll knock you out and tell Rydia to deal with it.

[He might be affected by this experiment, but there are limits to everything.]

The one with the blue veil and the shaking hips- No, no, that's not it. My grand-uncle's maternal grandmother's nephew's lover's ex-husband married into your family at some point, I'm quite sure of that.

[dragoon_pride]

[At least this strange experiment won't make him deny the dragoon thing... may want to be wary of the blond thing coming into dispute later. For now though...]

That cannot be absolutely right. It was your grand-uncle's PATERNAL grandmother's nephew's lover's ex-husband's stepson's mother-in-law's brother who was of relation, I'm sure of it.

[Option 1! Pick your poison because Sophie can't read so it actually doesn't matter. XD]

[lostlegacy]

[Sup, Kain. Have a little girl playing in the yard of a house that's along the road to the Battle Dome. What message do you have in store for her today? Whatever it is, hopefully you're good at miming, because Sophie? Is very much still learning to read.

She's rather used to seeing this guy pass by her house, and so she'll be waving at him now.] Hi!

[WORKS FOR ME! XD I shall just see where he goes with this lol]

[dragoon_pride]

[There's Kain, wandering by and... oh. She seems familiar somehow. He's sure he's had dealings with this girl's family in the past. In fact, he's convinced of it now, more than anything, and he has to come clean about it.]

I killed your father.

[Ok, Kain needs to STILL work on his saying hello techniques.]

[This is gonna be a disaster, I can just tell.]

[lostlegacy]

[Have a big ol' blank stare. It's for the best, though--the subject of Sophie's father is a pretty sensitive one.]

[TOTAL DISASTER YEP]

[dragoon_pride]

[Kain waves the paper more insistently, and tries to mimic gestures of stabbing at some invisible enemy. These charades are a lot trickier than plain daily life ones... hmmph...]

[lostlegacy]

[...This guy is weird.]

What are you doing?

[dragoon_pride]

[He gives her a Look. Though that softens up just a little before long, because for some reason he thinks Rydia would not approve of him scaring small children.]

[He does some more frantic gesturing, then writes,]

I'm revealing the truth to you? Do you not understand?