lucetilogs | Zompania Draft - Draftees only, days 1-3.5

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Zompania Draft - Draftees only, days 1-3.5

Who: All Draftees
What: This is your death. Followed by your time-traveling life and desperate bomb hunting.
When: From May 22 to May 20 to early May 23 (days 1-4)
Where: Zompania
Summary: Information post here
Rating: Varies on thread, please mark explicit material.

This post is for the draftee-only portion of the Zompania draft--the day 3 death, time travel to day 1, and then the events until the arrival of the reinforcements. Be sure to use the above info post for any plotting needs you might have. Enjoy!

Please note that there is a specific top-level comment thread for:

The day 3 arrival of the draftees and the 6 hours that follow until the bomb is dropped
Death--This thread can be treated as REFERENCE ONLY. Responding to it isn't necessary.
Threads prior to departing for Zompania--post resurrection freak outs, arguments over how to proceed, etc.

All other threading, from day 1 until the reinforcements arrive, should be conducted as normal.

Be sure to tag this post appropriately: [canon] character name

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He looks up at Frigga, back at Billy.]

That's not possible.

[Frigga rests her hand on his shoulder.]

Perhaps he is one of them, trying to stop us.

[Billy finally takes a risk, stepping closer and crouching down beside Loki. The grass squelches unpleasantly at his feet, and he fights to ignore it. If he looks down he'll probably puke.]

I know that... you want to believe it's her. I know you must want to see her again. If it was my mother, I...

[He grimaces and shakes it off. He can sympathize, but this isn't about him. And his mother is well and alive, waiting for him to come home. This place would be Loki's only chance.]

...It isn't her, Loki. Please... please, you have to believe me... you have to come back, or we'll die here...

No, Billy, it is her. Mother's alive again. She's alive. [He shakes his head.] She said she forgives me. We're doing magics together again.

Don't be silly. Why would you even say something like that?

I'm saying it because I have to. Because I want you to live.

[He gestures, without looking, to his arm, and the blood in the grass.]

Why would she do this to you? Is this how magic is supposed to be like with your mom? Hurting yourself, bleeding all over the ground just to make a tree grow? What kind of messed-up spell is this? Have you ever had to do this before?

[If he's wrong about this, at least he'll know more about Frigga, perhaps more than he'd ever want to know. But the idea of a mother making her child bleed all over the ground, asking him to do it, smiling like that when he's getting weaker and weaker... it's wrong. It's so wrong.]

She never taught me this spell. The orchards were already grown by the time Odin stole me...

[He shakes his head. Frigga's hand tightens on his shoulder.] Old magics require blood. It's... it doesn't hurt. Nothing hurts.

Loki.

[Billy levels with him, trying to meet his gaze, his own as clear as he can make them without losing the desperation he can't help feeling. He hates that she's holding on to him like that. Can he push her away? Will that just make him angry? He can't risk it, not now...]

You love your mom. It's easy to tell. And I'm certain she loved you, too. If... if this was your mom... would she really ask you to do this? Really, honestly ask you to lie down in the middle of a dangerous city and bleed your life away for a spell?

[Loki give his head a little shake and says in a terribly small, weak voice:] ...but it's finally my turn to save someone.

[He couldn't protect Frigga. And if Thor is dead... if Thor is dead he couldn't save him either. But maybe finally, he won't destroy everything he touches. He'll save Billy, and Rogue, and Iroh, and Jack, and Eugene, and he's just so tired of feeling helpless, of being told he's not warrior enough, too much of a monster. Magic will win this day, won't it?]

You can save someone. You can save yourself, and me, right now. And then you can go back into the field once you're healed up and save as many people as you want.

[He reaches out at last to touch Loki's arm, just above where it's bleeding. He said it didn't hurt, but... if he could feel it, would he be able to see?]

You're the only one with the power to do it. Without your help, we'll be trapped like this until we're both dead. Until she kills us.

[Loki recoils slightly.]

She wouldn't hurt us. [He's starting to sound desperate.] She wouldn't let Odin have me executed.

[He shakes his head again, voice dropping to a whisper.] It's already my fault she died. Don't ask me to kill her again.

I would never ask you to kill your mother. Not ever.

[The thought of killing someone, anyone, even an enemy, makes him cringe. But something has to be done. They have to at least disrupt the shift, and unfortunately, only the person actually affected by the shift can do that. That's what he's been told by the people who've actually been affected by it, and he trusts their word. If it were his choice, he'd have done it himself already, magicked them both out of here to somewhere safe. But this isn't real at all- just a space created in Loki's own head. He's helpless here.]

But she's not your mother. She's an imposter. I saw it- I walked into the circle myself, that's how I got here. She's pretending to be Frigga so she can kill you.... and there's no way in hell I'm letting that happen.

[But how could he have been so mistaken? He knows Frigga better than Billy does. How would Billy even know that?

He doesn't want that to be true.]

How do you know that? You must be mistaken, Billy. I know my mother. I know her.

[Only the problem is he does know her, and the more Billy picks at this, the more he begins to see the holes, the things that don't make sense, the little, telling differences.]

You do know her. I get it. That's why... this is so hard. She's in your head- we both are, right now. She's taken your memories and created this- the tree, her appearance, the spell- all of it came from what you know of her. She's giving you exactly what you want so you won't fight it. That's how these shifts work.

[He bites his lip, his hand sliding down to grasp Loki's, squeezing urgently. Please, please...]

I wish I was wrong. You have no idea how much I'd love for this to be real. But it isn't... and... I can't let you die. I can't... not after... not after Thor, I... please, Loki... help me...

[Frigga's hand tightens on Loki's shoulder.] This boy isn't your friend, my son. Listen to the lies he's telling you. You must defend us.

[Only that doesn't quite make sense, does it? Frigga is more than capable of defending herself. Billy isn't such a threat as that. None of this makes sense.

He needs a moment.

Loki tries to stand, only to find his legs don't quite want to support him any longer. He falls back down to his knees and half crawls a short distance away. The grass is very wet under his hands; it takes him a moment to realize that it's blood, his own blood.]

What--

Billy? Mother?

[Billy swallows hard, daring to hope. He's close. He can feel it. He's so close. He shifts to stand up, offering a hand out, ready to support Loki- to pull him up instead of holding him in place the way the imposter is. It's time to move, not just stand still.]

You can tell, can't you? There's something wrong with this. With all of it. She wouldn't want you to die like this, right? She'd want you to fight... to live. Just like everyone else who cares about you. Loki Friggason wouldn't just lay down and die.

[Loki reaches to take Billy's hand, then hesitates.]

How do I know this is you? How do I know any of this is real?

[He's beginning to doubt everything.]

[Frigga stays where she is.]

You are strong, my son. This spell is difficult, but you are equal to it. It will not hurt you, only tire both of us out. But if you let this impostor break your focus, it all all be for naught.

[Billy keeps one hand out, determined not to lose or give up here, not when he was so very close. But... how would he know? He can't use magic, it's Loki's head so it wouldn't work here. But it's his subconscious, and...

...would Loki's magic work? He's not certain, and he could be taking a huge risk if it doesn't work, but he doesn't know how else to prove his own identity. If this becomes a battle of her word versus his own, he's not sure he can win.]

It isn't real. That's the problem. But I think... I might be able to prove it.

[Reaching down, he unhooks the top of a pouch at his belt, and pulls out a dagger. The one Loki had given him, in fact. Frigga's.]

Do you still have your ward on me, Loki? It'd tell you if I got hurt, right? The real me?

Yes, I still have a ward on you... [If that is you--

But his eyes fix on the dagger, the very familiar lines of it. He gave that to Billy. But if this is a dream, he'd know that, wouldn't he? How can he trust anything? Still, hesitantly, he reaches out to touch the dagger's hilt with the tip of his finger.

It sings.

He raises his gaze to Billy's, breath hitching, and whispers:] Why isn't it singing for Mother?

[Billy bites his lip, eyes widening in slight surprise. He doesn't know what just happened; it'd never done that for him.]

It can't. It's not her. She's... not real.

[Solemnly, he presses the edge of the dagger to his forearm, between his armored glove and his elbow, and gives himself a shallow cut, hoping it's enough, hoping that it works.]

But I am. I... I'm so sorry.

[He feels that little echo of pain on the ward. It's real, isn't it? Could he dream such a thing? Could he dream the dagger Frigga gave him recognizing him, but not her presence?

His breath hitches in his throat. Then carefully, he wraps his fingers around the dagger's hilt, over Billy's. He leans forward to rest his forehead against Billy's. His eyes hurt. His throat hurts. His head swims.]

Please don't make me do this. Please. [He's already killed her once, and he didn't have to see her bleed. How can he do it again?]

[It's worse, somehow, Loki recognizing the truth. It had been easier when he was happy, or confused, or simply unsure. Now, though, with their hands joined on the dagger, with the truth covering them like a cloud, smothering all the joy and making it hard to breathe... he hates this more. He hates it so much.

He takes a shaky breath, his grip tightening on the dagger, free hand lifting to wind around Loki's shoulders to hold him there, wishing for all the world that he could just pull him free and leave it at that. But magic can't do everything. He knows that all too well now.]

I can't... make you do anything. You have to make that choice. All I can do is help you... and be here till it's over.

[Whether Loki chooses to do this, or... whether they both die, Billy isn't going anywhere. Even if he could escape, after all this, how could he leave?

No. Family means no one gets left behind.

The quote makes him smile, painfully, and think of Teddy. If they die today...

...No. I won't regret this.

At least... I tried.]

You won't be alone. I promise...

[but it isn't real. She isn't real. So how is this a choice at all?

Loki takes a deep breath, then begins to rise, leaning heavily on Billy as he does.

Frigga begins to stand. But even shaking and weak, Loki is fast. The dagger lashes out to cut across her throat. For a moment she hangs in the air, face surprised, shocked, betrayed, eyes fixed on Loki. She reaches a hand out toward him.

Loki screams like he will tear in two.

The dream shatters.

What falls to the ground is not Frigga, bit Loki does not see. He sags against Billy, a soft sound of despair coming from him.]

[Billy's still holding the dagger when it connects, though he closes his eyes as the blood appears. He can't bear to watch that happen again, not after yesterday. Instead, he focuses on Loki, only sparing a moment to cast a quick spell on the now-powerless shifter to make sure that they won't be getting up to attack them again. Maybe if Loki thinks they're dead, he can forget them more easily.

He gently pulls the dagger free of their joined grip, setting it down on the ground, and winds both arms around Loki, gently rocking as he would his little brothers when they cried with him if their mom wasn't around. With the illusion broken, his appearance is back to how it was before he'd stepped into the bubble- exhausted, dirty, covered in blood- but he pays it no mind, either. He's just so, so relieved.

I didn't fail... I didn't let him die, I...

...Thor, I saved him. I saved him for you.

It doesn't make up for what happened, but... it helps. A little bit, it helps. To know that this, at least, he can manage without failing.]

I'm sorry... I'm so sorry, Loki... I'm sorry...

[Loki doesn't really notice the state of Billy's clothes. Nothing matters to him; it feels as if nothing will ever really matter again. For a long moment he just stays limp against Billy, helplessly clutching at his blood-stiffened clothing.

This is more than he has capacity to bear, right now. Because it runs through his mind, what a fool, what a fool, how eager he'd been to grasp for forgiveness when there can be none, when there will never be any at all, and Frigga is still dead by his hand. Frigga dead, and him helpless in a cage while it happened, unknowing until a guard had told him. And now Thor dead, while Loki the fool thrice over had sat in his cage and bled for a shade because he was so desperate, so pathetically desperate...

Face pressed against Billy's shoulder, he begins to scream again, pain and grief and rage. His hands curl so tightly to fists that they shake. Around them, the grass begins to shred, the trees creaking and cracking, shaking in a breeze that is not there.]

[Billy is quiet at first, just holding him and waiting it out, although he keeps his eye very carefully on their surroundings to make sure they don't get ambushed and trapped again, or worse, killed outright. But when Loki starts screaming again, he jumps, startled, his gaze drifting to the ground below them, watching the trees and grass react to a power that he can't see, but he's definitely beginning to feel.

Shit.

His grip tightens, and he gives Loki a little shake, trying to get his attention.]

Loki... Loki, I... can't imagine what you must be feeling right now. But we can't... we're not safe here. We have to find the others...

[He could just teleport them directly - if he trusts himself to pull it off, that is - but he can't take Loki to their allies if he's going to freak out. Billy has no idea what Loki's using his magic to do, but if this gets any worse... what if someone got hurt?]

[Loki runs out of breath eventually, about the time Billy shakes him. He gives the boy a hopeless, almost blank look.

Around them, the trees explode into clouds of splinters. Destruction is sudden, indiscriminate, and absolute.]

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