lucetilogs | Mission: Building the Future in Pagoda

[Pilouette nods. She's glad to be able to do something useful and even more glad to have someone asking her to do it. Though she's become more confident as of late, she's still more comfortable being directed than not. She begins to look over her own supplies to see what each kit needs.]

Got it. I'll do my best to make sure they've got everything a person could need! ...A-and I'll try not to stay up too late.

[Even if Mia told her to sleep, likely she'll just stay up making kits until she accidentally dozes off in the middle of one. Sleeping is much harder than it was before the draft.]

[Mia takes out her bag of supplies, to look through them and see if she needs to add anything; it is necessary and doubles as a great reason to stick around and watch Pilouette for a while.

She's a study in the endurance of people, this student of hers. Difficult tasks make her hesitate but do not stop her; suffering rightfully makes her sick, and then she turns and volunteers to face more of it. In certain small quiet moments, like this one, Mia gets the sense that she's at the fringes of someone extraordinary who just hasn't come to know it yet.

It would be very difficult to say as much to Pilouette without flustering her or sounding insincere, though, and Mia wisely keeps her mouth shut about that feeling whenever it comes up.

There is one particular lesson she struggles with, and struggles to get Pilouette to believe in, however.]

You know...you don't have to shoulder all of this alone.

[Caught a little off guard, Pilouette stops what she's doing and looks at Mia. After a moment she shifts her gaze off to the side.]

I know, but sometimes I want to. ...Just to make sure I can.

[It's not that she doesn't appreciate people helping her and supporting her but she wonders sometimes if she'll always need to be helped. Even though she's better at following orders than giving them and as scared as she gets when she's alone in bad situations...she wants to be able to support herself with her own two legs and sometimes she feels the need to prove to herself that she can handle things, that she has some measure of control.]

Edited 2014-07-31 09:58 (UTC)

[Eyebrows raised, Mia looks up, the corners of her mouth turning up just a bit in response to that answer. Pilouette is not looking at her; Mia decides not to wait until she does.]

I apologize for making an assumption like that. [What a mature, clever answer she gave. Back to plucking supplies from the pile, Mia moves a little more slowly, hiding her smile by turning it toward the table.] Please forgive my mistake.

Huh? There's like, nothing for you to apologize for, really!

[She turns to look at Mia. She doesn't see that smile, but Pilouette is glad that she didn't push the issue. It makes her feel like Mia understands what she means. She smiles a bit, sheepishly, and lets out a quiet chuckle.]

It's not a big deal anyway. I think that maybe I'm just the kind of person who looks like they need a lot of help or something.

That's not it. I don't like to see my friends hurting, if I think there's something I can do to help.

[And, because she is herself, Mia always thinks there must be something.]

So I forget, sometimes, that I can't solve every problem for everybody.

[A hard lesson, one that hammers back down every time someone in this enclosure dies.]

Well...well, no one can solve everyone's problems. There are just too many...

[And not nearly enough time.]

Still, though, you always do so much, even if you can't help everyone. It...It's kind of amazing, you know?

[She doesn't want to sound insincere; after all, she really means it. Mia's become much more than a teacher to her. She's someone Pilouette wants to be like.]

Thank you. That isn't the first time I've heard someone say that. [It never feels true.] Usually, I try to explain that all I can ever do is 'as much as I can'...and usually, it doesn't seem the other person understands what that means. But I think you do.

[After everything she's learned and seen and done.]

Really?

[It's rare that Pilouette is ever told that she understands something that others don't. In fact, this is the first time it's ever happened and it leaves her surprised. She thinks about it for a moment.]

Really, I think I only started to understand not too long ago.

[She smiles just a little. How long has it been since she thought that her efforts would never amount to anything and how much has she managed to learn in that time?]

You know like, that day that I asked for someone to teach me first aid? I'm really glad you're the one that answered me.

[It's been a long time since that day, nearly two years. Mia looks at Pilouette again. It is a teacher's privilege to watch her students grow and improve...but they don't all end up as close friends. There's a lot of warm affection in Mia's smile.]

I'm really glad you asked.

[Pilouette is feeling a bit better. The mental fatigue has faded away, just a little, and her smile grows just a little broader. As she works on the kits, she wonders if Mia knows how grateful she is to her, not just for being her teacher but for being her friend.]

...Maybe after we get back to Luceti, we can like, figure out when to do that thing. With the tarts.

[After all, she figures it might be a nice distraction after their time in Pagoda.]

As soon as humanly possible, if I have any say in it. We could do with a bit of fun.

[Mia is mutually grateful. If left to herself, she starts to forget how to get herself out of being a healer all the time, and now she has Zompania as proof.]

Like, totally! It's been kind of hard to have a good time lately, huh...?

[Not that she doesn't understand why. The events of Zompania have weighed heavily on everyone and she imagines that it's especially hard for a healer like Mia who is often tasked with saving the lives of others.]

I think lots of people could use some fun, you know?

I agree with all of that. [Hm. Mia folds her arms, thoughtful as well as defensive against potential dark musings.] What would you think about doing something a little more involved, then? Something like a party, but not very big.

A party but not really a party... [Pilouette thinks she understands. Something like a party but...a little bit more low-key. Just so people can have a little fun and relax a little rather than actively celebrating something, perhaps.] It sounds like a good idea. What did you have in mind?

Nothing until a minute or two ago. Kurt and the others are always trying to convince me to do this thing that they do, where they sit together on the couch and watch a- a movie. It could be something simple like that.

Oh! Something like that would great!

[She hasn't just watched a movie with friends since she was back home. Actually, when was the last time she even watched a movie? Now that she thinks about it, she hasn't done much of anything lately that could be considered just...hanging out with friends.]

Or maybe we could have like, a picnic or something! That might be kinda nice...

As long as we can count on the weather, a picnic sounds lovely. It ought to be something that doesn't require a lot of energy from everybody, hm?

Yeah...something low stress so everyone can relax for a little bit. It probably wouldn't take much planning or anything, either...! Maybe it could be like, a potluck picnic or something so that one or two people aren't stuck making all the food.

[Just the idea of it is boosting her mood a little.]

That puts us in charge of dessert, then, right? I think we can manage that.

Right! We totally can!

[As excited as she is about the idea, a part of her feels a little guilty about getting so hyped for it considering where they currently are and what they're doing. But still...]

Once we're back in Luceti, we'll have time to really plan this thing out!

I hope we have the time. Who would you most like to invite, Pilouette?

[Mia doesn't feel guilt about it. Conversations like this are necessary in a crisis whenever they can happen.]

[For once, Pilouette doesn't have to think very long about her answer, smiling as she talks.]

Well, there's Rin and Miss Grune, of course, and Mac and...Well, lots of people...! [Really it's hard to list them all. After all, there are so many people who could use a good time.] Oh! Oh, what about you? Who would you invite?

Probably the people I live with. [Grune is another good choice, Mia knows her well enough to know she's a cheerful influence.] Maybe one or two others, but I'm not sure at all if they would say yes. I think it should stay small enough that nobody has to overwork themselves in making food.

Yeah...if people had to do too much work it would kind of like, defeat the whole purpose, huh? But I bet anyone would come if you asked them to!

[Pilouette has always assumed that Mia is well-liked with lots of friends. Who wouldn't want to come to a gathering if Mia invited them? Pilouette smiles as she starts grouping together the laid out supplies for the extra first aid kits.]

Besides, it'll be nice to do something really normal for a little while.

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