We are the named and we are known

[lucetimods]

Who: All Draftees
What: Arriving at the dorms
When: 26th
Where: Dorms, location unknown
Summary: Dorm information is here. This is your room!
Rating: PG... we hope?

Your characters are shuffling off to their rooms. Each room has their name beside it and only they can open the door. People can only enter their room if they're allowed in (or they leave the door open). Characters will find any requested items in their room already. If they have a requested vehicle, there will be another door in their room that will take them to the hangar to inspect their equipment.

((Mod note: Extra draftees won't experience their Shift Incompatibility handicap in their dorms. :|a))

Comments

[fourteen]

... when I walked in, you told me to leave you alone. [ she's going to sit lightly on the edge of the bed, reaching out to very gently brush at his bangs. ] ... Somehow I don't think you would've said that, if it was just a cold.

[ledbythewind]

[She'll be able to feel the heat even before her fingers actually reach his forehead... but when they do, he pulls away.]

Please, I...

[fourteen]

No.

[ firmly. with that, she gets up. she'll be back in a moment or two with a damp cloth and a glass of water. the water she sets down on the bedside table, but the cloth she'll reach out and press to his forehead. ]

[ledbythewind]

[He almost tries to pull away again, but that feels good and he's so tired that he simply doesn't have the energy to do so.]

Why are you being so kind to me?

[fourteen]

[ the question seems to surprise her. ] You're my friend, Richard.

[ledbythewind]

You would call someone like me a friend...?

[fourteen]

... of course!

[ledbythewind]

Xion...

[He inhales deeply, trying to maintain his very rapidly weakening control over his emotions.]

[fourteen]

...

[ if she's honest with herself, she knows why he's upset. she spoke to Naoki, after all. this must be...

but for him to say these things about himself... to devalue himself so much! it's familiar... in a terrible way. though one hand keeps the cloth pressed to his forehead, with the other she reaches out to brush his hair back again, her mouth pressing into a line. what does she say...? ]

damn you gmail and your comment stacking /accidentally deleted notif, fffff

[ledbythewind]

[He's not sure whether or not the feeling that he's a horrible person hurts more than losing Naoki like that, or whether he even wants to try to compare them, but if he can focus on hating himself, then he doesn't have to think about the pain as much. And besides, it's all his fault anyway...]

... I want to go home.

[It's a simple statement, yet one he would never have made just a few short weeks ago.]

[fourteen]

Richard....

[ Xion removes the cloth, if only to refold it and press it again to his skin, so it'll be cool. She continues to brush his hair back, gentle petting motions. ]

... I know what that feels like. Once I wanted to go home, too. Back then, it felt like... everything hurt, and nothing was going right... everything was such a mess. It felt like there wasn't any point to being here anymore.

But even though it felt like things would never get better... they did. I know that's hard to see now, but... you have to hang in there. You have friends that'll support you, and stay by your side. We'll help you get through this... I promise.

[ledbythewind]

[He's quiet for a moment, because... really, it's not as if things would be better back there, either. But hearing her talking about friends... it hurts more than he expected, and he just curls up into a tighter ball.]

Why would they support me if they can't even forgive me?

[It's said with an almost bitter tone, anger mostly at himself.]

[fourteen]

... sometimes forgiveness is really hard. [ she knows this better than anyone. ] But just because you can't forgive someone... doesn't mean you don't still care about them. It's kind of complicated... but I'll support you, Richard. [ firmly. ] No matter what happens.

[ledbythewind]

[He just shakes his head, trying to press his face into the blankets on the bed.]

I don't deserve it. I did something horrible...

[fourteen]

Don't. [ just as firmly. ] I've done horrible things too. Things that can never be forgiven. But that doesn't mean I don't deserve friends, and support, and the chance to live my own life.

[ she lifts the cloth, and dabs gently at his face, again brushing his hair back. ]

... you deserve the same chance. Don't for a second think that you don't.

[ledbythewind]

[Richard swallows hard, tries to force back the lump rising in his throat, because she doesn't understand, she says those things but she doesn't understand...]

... I hurt them both.

[fourteen]

[ she's silent for a moment. her next words are quiet, a little plaintive ]

I don't know if it's possible to live without hurting other people...

[ Riku.

but she pushes on. ]

But even if that's true... that still doesn't mean you don't deserve those things I said, Richard. All it means is that you have to try to earn forgiveness. It doesn't mean ... you're any less of a person, or ... or that you don't deserve to have any friends.

[ she's not even sure whose side she's on, anymore. ]

[ledbythewind]

Can I really earn forgiveness...?

[He doesn't believe he can. And if he can't earn it here, how can he possibly do so back in his world?]