lucetilogs | I've been chillin' out on a star with my 5 star view

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I've been chillin' out on a star with my 5 star view

Who: All draftees
What: The space battle commences
When: After 3PM on the 19th to the 23rd
Where: In Space! On the Moon!
Summary: The battle finally begins! First there's asteroids to take down, then we finally arrive!
Rating: SPACE

MORE SPACE

All the details you need are here, so read up on it. This didn't get mentioned before, but you can tag the cultists instead of killing them. Details on this are on a previous draft post. Using the scanners are optional!

There will be a thread for interacting with NPCs, but they may not all go up at once, so keep an eye out for them.

Note: A log for the events in the village will go up on the 21st, in time for the hurricane and droid incursion.

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[She had heard about those. Her brow furrows and she pauses a moment as she thinks through what something like that might have meant to him - the merging of times and experiences; the life of his people...

She makes no move to reclaim his hand. She doesn't feel worthy of it.]

That must have been very difficult for you.

It... it really was, Katara. They gave me things I wouldn't want to let go. The... the air nomads, you guys, Jet, Roku... and the fact that they were all happy. The fact that I knew my parents and had an awesome girlfriend. And... and of course, the enemy had to disguise himself as [He dares a brief glance at her] you.

[Katara feels dread twist in her stomach.]

So... what happened?

[He focuses back at the ceiling, trying to relate the story in an impersonal process, but emotion quickly begins seeping through his words.]

Well... you know Oswald, who runs that penpal thing? He... he came in to save me. And... it took some worth, but then I started to see the truth. And I felt really hurt and betrayed by everything in that world being a lie. That's... that's what started it. And the only way to get out was to attack the imposter. I... I can only kind of remember... starting to- to- to end something that looked like you, while I was... entering the Avatar State. I don't know... where I ended and it began. [Pause, and he whispers.] I... I feel so ashamed.

[Starting to end something that looked a lot like you.

That was frightening and saddening on so many levels...

I don't know... where I ended and it began.]

[Breathe.

She found her focus and set her fear aside.]

Aang... [She leaned forward slightly.] Aang, look at me.

[He lay silently for a moment. After recalling all of that, he was too afraid to actually face her. But Aang relented ultimately, and he turned to face her with eyes full of worry.]

I know that must have been so terrible and so frightening for you. And I won't lie and tell you it doesn't scare me a little bit either. But I know you. And you know me. And you know that I would never want to hurt you. Anything that's trying to hurt you while wearing my face isn't me, it's just a monster.

[Sudden inspiration.]

It's just like Koh. And I don't ever want you to hesitate to defend yourself, even if what's attacking you looks like me. I could never live with myself if I knew that the reason why you were hurting was because you wouldn't raise a hand against me - and anyone or anything that says otherwise is a liar.

[She paused, dropping her gaze for a moment and remembering the intensity of the Avatar's glare fixed on her... and she lifted her gaze to him, again refusing to fear. Even if he hurt her, even if her strange immunity to the Avatar's judgement had passed because of how she'd changed, because of this place teaching Aang not to trust her, she would never leave him alone in that state. That was her choice. That was how she'd be true to the part of herself that she knows is right and good, even in the midst of so much moral uncertainty.

She lifted her gaze to his again.]

I trust you.

Edited 2012-07-02 05:06 (UTC)

[He listens carefully at first and hesitantly. What if he is just going to scare her away? And the "Koh" comparison raises a new set of fears. He remembers Koh wearing that woman's face, whom he later learned was Avatar Kuruk's wife. What if he couldn't...

Those worries disappear when her eyes meet his.]

[She still looks into his eyes, as she looks at him the same way she did when he tried to attack her. His own eyes began to shimmer slightly as she says her three simple words. In the state Aang is in, the "t" word feels even more effective than the "l" one. A fond smile crosses his face.]

Thank you, Katara. Thank you... so much. It means so much to me that... that you can still trust me after all of this. You're too good.

[No, I'm not.]

[Somewhere, she finds a smile for him.]

I don't have to be good to know that you would never hurt me. The real me. That's just not who you are, Aang. You're not someone who tries to stop by hurting people - you only move to fight when it's your last option. And you're loyal and kind - I don't believe you'd ever want to hurt any of your friends. Sometimes you just need to be reminded of that part of yourself... [like when you enter the Avatar state - the thought of him turning all that power against her, deliberately, really was terrifying, and she was honest enough to admit that, but concerned enough for him that she was able to look passed it] ...but it's something I really admire about you.

[So I won't forget.]

[Hearing himself in Katara's words, Aang starts to feel partly refreshed. That's who he is, and Katara remembers.]

That... that means a whole lot, Katara. I've been afraid of how this place could change me and what I could become. But you give me hope that I still can hold onto myself. You've been here so much longer and... and been through so much more, but you're still you. I know you would have said something like that back home. And I admire that you're still the bravest one of us. I havw faith that you'd always be there to remind me of that.

But at the same time... I'm afraid to keep on depending on I when Iose control. I can't keep on endangering you like this. I have to take responsibility for the Avatar State and control it.

[Water is the element of change. It goes from ice, to fog, to water, and it still remains the same. We can do the same thing, Aang, we can change but stay the same.]

How do you mean?

You... you remember when we were talking about chakras? Those chakra things are what Guru Pathik taught me when I trained with him at the Eastern Air Temple. Unlocking all of my chakras can let me use the Avatar State at will and have control over it. The only time I tried it was... was in the catacombs, when I was desperate. And... and you know know how that ended. [Pause] But I think I have to try again.

[She remembers. She remembers Aang moving to seclude herself and momentarily leaving her alone. She remembers him coming out in the Avatar State, how relieved she was, how proud was - he'd found a way to master it and everything was going to be okay. Nothing could stop him like that, and if he was in control, then they could take out Azula and Zuko and save the city, and everything would be all right.

But it wasn't. It was the farthest thing from all right.

She remembers. It would be impossible to forget the pain and terror and grief she felt, watching him fall, making it there just in time to catch him. She had been so scared, so lost, and so scared that he wasn't coming back, and that hope was gone with him.

But she remembers something else too. "Those chakra things."]

I remember. You said something about... forgetting all earthly attachments?

["The only way is to let her go."]

Yeah, that's... the final chakra. I've had trouble with that one. All of the other ones... some of them weren't easy, but I was letting go of negative feelings. When I unlocked those chakras, I felt relief. [And when he thinks of all the stress overwhelming him now, that relief feels welcoming.] But with the last chakra... it's giving up something that could be positive. Something that you want to hold onto. I couldn't see how love was a bad thing.

[Her brows come together, not fully seeing the connection between "love" and being "in love." She hears love and thinks love in general, love of friends, love of family, love of the world...]

It's not. Love is the best connection that we have in this world.

[His heart skips a beat, but he makes himself keep his head on the conversation. He's longer in eye contact, drifting his eyes towards the floor.]

I... I thought something like that, myself. ["How is it a bad thing that I feel an attachment to her? Three chakras ago, that was a good thing."] But today helped me to finally realize how it could be bad, to... to be emotionally attached to a person. Now I'm starting to think that this kind of love can make it easier to become emotionally imbalanced and slip into the Avatar State. And this place makes getting angry on your behalf too easy, with all of the horrible things they do and make us do.

[A person.... your behalf...

Wait.

Was this about... me?

All that was holding him back from achieving control of the Avatar State was his feeling for... me?

Suddenly, the way he removed himself in the catacombs took on a whole new meaning.]

[She can't bring herself to ask, to confirm it. The words are right there, but she can't make herself do it.]

Oh.

[She looks down, her emotions and thoughts in a whirlwind. She just needs a moment to process this, okay?]

[He looks at her in concern and realizes that... she might not know. He didn't exactly tell her, after all. Well... he tried to give her the idea in different words, back then. "You're everything I love about the earth in one person."

But he could see that... she might be processing it now. So he just looks at her.]

Katara...

[She holds up a hand without looking up, because really - she needs a minute.

She doesn't love him like that.

He's not just a friend. He's much more than that. She doesn't know what he is, she's never had to try to put a name on it before - he's Aang.

She doesn't think of him like That. Though he's as tall as she is now, there are still many ways in which she looks at him like a little boy who she needs to take care of, guide, and encourage. He's not...

"Well... what if we kissed?"
"Us, kissing?"
"See? It was a crazy idea."

...she could recall everything amount that moment, even though she hadn't thought about it in so long, and somehow in the middle of this maelstrom of emotion and confusion, that shy, giddy anticipation of... something manages to briefly assert itself.

She shook her head minutely - this wasn't the time to be thinking like that, feeling like that. She had to be logical. What was a little fluttery feeling compared to what he was talking about? Nothing, less than nothing.

She wasn't being fair.

She thought of Masaomi and shut her eyes, her heart sinking.

No, if giving up his love for her meant that he could control the Avatar State, then maybe... maybe it would be less hurtful for Aang if he did that. But.

But if it was his love for her that helped form this connection between them that she couldn't completely name, couldn't completely face or understand, then... did she really want to risk losing that? And if his connection to her was what kept him back, what brought him back when he was in the Avatar State, what held him to the world...

She lowers her hand and continues to look down, and when she speaks, her voice is low.]

No, I don't think you were wrong.

[He looks on hesitantly.]

Wrong to... to question giving that up?

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