lucetilogs | Draft Log #3: During v. 2.0

No, that part's normal. But they aren't supposed to bleed and stuff! This game's E-rated!

[... Isn't it? That's a sobering thought. NINTENDO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

... Never mind that she's in a war and that isn't exactly a children's topic either...]

[More confused staring. You are very strange, raining destruction one minute, going on about games the next. He'll write another statement out. Because he is Mr. Serious when it comes to this kind of thing.]

This war is no game.

[... Yep, Kazooie's a weirdo that way.]

I don't mean just this war, purple jumpin' guy. I mean the whole game. Luceti and stuff.

[She shrugs her wings, a smooth motion.] Though you wouldn't be the first guy who didn't know what I'm talking about.

[Aaaand here comes another utterly confused expression. Kain takes a wary glance around, but things seem clear enough so, he'll keep asking...]

Then what are you talking about? How can you see our prison as a game?

'Cause I come from a game. I'm a character. [She says this rather matter-of-factly, with a touch of the same condescension one might use for somebody who's stupid.] One of the heroes, actually!

[Her tone sobers slightly as she looks around the battlefield, at the corpses at their feet.] Though I've never done anything quite like this.

It's less gross, for one.

[Kain stares back incredulously. A game? But someone from a game of some kind couldn't possibly exist, could they? ~~Oh irony.~~]

You may have come from a game, but this entire world in contrast, is no game. This is reality.

[Though to be fair, he knows that many people aren't used to or ready for the realities of war out here.]

I doubt anyone is ever prepared for what to expect.

... Reality? [Kazooie has never known life outside a game. To her, Luceti is a game too - just another kind of game, a new game that isn't a sequel.] What the heck do you mean by that?

Do you mean all this... mess and stuff? Is that "reality"? If it is, it's pretty gross...

[Kain nods, sternly.]

Reality can be cruel and harsh... that's just how it is, we have to accept it. I suppose you could call it 'messy' at times.

[What kind of world ISN'T like this? It's odd to think of, to him.]

So this reality-thing is... outside a game. [She knows what that is. It's that ethereal space, that... Not-Game World, that made her game. That brought her world into existence. That make her do stupid stuff like censor herself for the E-rating.]

And you're saying this is reality? What if it's just another game but with more mess and stuff?

Our lives cannot be reduced to a mere game. The very idea is preposterous. Although... I almost would not put such a thing past the Malnosso.

[After two years of their experiments, Kain seriously wouldn't doubt anything could be thrown at them.]

Way I see it, it's pretty much like every other game I've been in. A bunch of heroes, beating bad guys up, protecting important stuff...

... The only difference is that there isn't any way to win. [And that's the most serious she's sounded so far in this conversation.]

[Now getting serious is something Kain understands, better than all the talk of games.]

I doubt this war ever will be won, any time soon.

We gotta figure out how. This stupid thing can't just go on forever! [Impatience drives Kazooie to say this, as well as the nagging feeling that even she wouldn't be able to fight that long without growing truly exhausted.]

... There's always some way. Somehow. A hero doesn't give up, and I'm a real hero!

[There's one thing Kain can agree on at least. Because he's used to pushing on even at times when he really shouldn't.]

Even should it last forever... giving up is no option.

Are you a hero too then? [Because only heroes give answers like that, from Kazooie's limited perspective.] 'Cause I haven't seen you around before, Purple Jumping Guy.

[A hero AND a villain. Both. Sigh. But that's far more than he wants to explain right now. So he'll shrug.]

I don't know if I can call myself that. Although... I'm a dragoon, which is a type of knight. Fighting battles and defeating powerful enemies is my purpose.

Then we got the same purpose! That's pretty much what I do.

Put 'er there, pal. [And she sticks a membranous wing out to Kain, as though this is a totally normal thing.]

I'm only a Dragon for awhile, though. It's a special transformation the Malnosso-guys let me have for this fight!

[What do you want of him? Kain stands there baffled and then realizes he's meant to put his hand there. Which he does.]

If not a dragon, what are you?

[He'll let it slide, he supposes, a dragon transformation is still an impressive thing.]

[... Even with membranous wings, she can still work them in a finger-like way - and so she gives Kain's hand a rather exuberant shake.]

A red-crested breegull, most of the time!

... Most people don't know what that is.

[Kain returns the handshake, with a thoughtful expression. Yeah, it's not a dragon species, so he has no idea either.]

Then what is it?

It's a kind of bird! I dunno what kind, I'm no egghead. But we live on beaches.

[A specific beach, Breegull Beach, is where Kazooie was born. Sort of.]

You're a human-type thing, right? There sure are a lot of those here...

[Human... type... thing.]

Yes. I'm human. Are there not many where you're from?

Nope! Only a couple - maybe, like, eight at the most? [She's not exaggerating that number, either. There really are only a few humans in her games.] You guys are still pretty weird to get used to... though I'm living with one right now. Her name's Peachy.

Kinda reminds me of Banjo.

How strange... But are there real dragons in your world?

Yep! Two of 'em, actually. They're brothers, called Chilly Willy and Chilli Billi, and they live in Hailfire Peaks, on the tops of the big mountains.

They're pretty stupid 'cause they thought Banjo 'n' I were pizza delivery guys...

[... Yeah... sorry, Kain. No majestic dragons in Kazooie's world.]

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